Kingston Law Group’s child custody and parenting time  practice has helped hundreds of parents and children over the decades. These cases can be highly emotional and stressful, but they need not be. No matter which side of the issue you’re on, we can help. Call us at 609-683-7400 or contact us online to learn more.

What Is Parental Alienation?

Parental alienation is invoked in courtrooms across New Jersey and the country. It may be part of a child custody case where it’s used as a false accusation, a tactical weapon to discredit the other parent. Depending on who you ask, parental alienation is a well-documented form of emotional child abuse or a foundation-free theory that shouldn’t influence custody decisions. The truth, like the average child custody case, is not black or white.

Parental alienation, according to its supporters, is a situation where one parent systematically undermines a child’s relationship with the other parent through words, conduct, or manipulation. It was first labeled in the 1980s.

Stereotypically, the alienating parent:

• Makes negative statements about the other parent in the child’s presence
• Coaches the child to falsely report false abuse or neglect
• Restricts the other parent’s access to the child without legitimate justification
• Threatens to withhold love and attention unless the child chooses them over the other parent
• Enlists extended family members to reinforce a damaging narrative

The child caught up in this drama may:

• Repeat the alienating parent’s hostility
• Refuse to visit, talk to, or comply with the other parent’s directions or requests
• Accuse the targeted parent of behavior that never occurred or of repeating words that were never spoken
• Reject an otherwise healthy relationship without a rational explanation

The judge in a child custody case must make a decision based on the child’s best interests. They need to determine whether this situation is due to a parent’s manipulation or a response to abuse the child actually experienced.

How Would a Claim of Parental Alienation Impact a New Jersey Child Custody/Parenting Time Dispute?

A judge in this situation would be wise to appoint a guardian ad litem for the child. This is an independent advocate for the child who would investigate the accusations and determine, as best they can, whether a child’s alienation from a parent is the product of manipulation or genuine abuse. The judge may also have an independent psychological evaluation of the child and appoint an attorney to represent the child.

In New Jersey, the governing standard in custody matters is the best interests of the child. A judge should, if not prevent, at least limit the custody of a parent abusing their child in some way. Courts may modify custody arrangements, reduce parenting time, impose supervised visitation, or, in extreme cases, transfer primary residential custody to the other parent.

Emotional abuse of a child can be the kind that would make them want to stay away from a parent. It’s also emotionally manipulating a child to turn them against the other parent by making false allegations. Both can have long-term negative impacts on the child.

Under N.J.S.A. 9:2-4, courts must consider relevant factors when making custody determinations (the statute lists 16 factors and leaves it to the judge to consider others). Two important ones that touch on parental alienation claims are the following:

• The ability of each parent to communicate and cooperate in matters relating to the child
• The willingness of each parent to facilitate a relationship between the child and the other parent

Brand New Public Policy for New Jersey in Child Custody/Parenting Time Cases

Importantly, a recent change in the law of New Jersey mandates a strong presumption of judicial interviews of minor children. If you are navigating a divorce or a custody dispute in New Jersey, the ground beneath your feet just shifted in a significant way. On January 20, 2026, Governor Murphy signed Senate Bill S4510 into law. This is a fundamental transformation of how our courts view the “best interests of the child.”

For decades, the legal system operated under certain assumptions about parental contact. While the goal was always to keep both parents involved, the execution sometimes overlooked the specific nuances of safety and a child’s individual experience. The new law changes that. It demands that judges look at every family through a clear lens, without relying on old templates or generic presumptions. It moves us toward a system where the safety of the child is the starting point of every conversation, not an afterthought.

Balancing Child Safety Against Parental Alienation

A parent falsely accusing the other of abusing their child to alienate them from the other parent would flunk both these factors. A court could order reunification therapy, appoint a parenting coordinator, or hold an alienating parent in contempt for interfering with court-ordered parenting time.

The New Jersey Appellate Division’s 2024 decision in A.U.B. v. E.L. is a case in which a trial judge found the child’s mother actively tried to alienate her son against his father and awarded the father sole custody. The decision was upheld on appeal.

The trial judge found both parents were dysfunctional and “minimally fit” but ruled it was in the child’s best interests for the father to have sole custody and the mother to have limited parenting time. The Appellate Division stated in part:

The [trial] judge highlighted that plaintiff was the parent better able to communicate, cooperate, and facilitate parenting time in considering factors one and two. N.J.S.A. 9:2-4(c). In contrast, the judge found that defendant’s alienating behaviors undermined her ability to foster a relationship between plaintiff and the child. A parent’s repeated inability to co-parent and interfere with the other parent can support an award of sole legal custody to the other parent. Nufrio, 241 N.J. Super. at 555. See also Beck, 86 N.J. at 499 (“[W]hen the actions of [an uncooperative] parent deprive the child of the kind of relationship with the other parent that is deemed to be in the child’s best interests, removing the child from the custody of the uncooperative parent may well be appropriate as a remedy of last resort.”). As [the independent psychologist working on the case] explained, defendant was incapable of finding any positive element in plaintiff’s relationship with the child, and her inability resulted in her alienating behavior and interference with parenting time. And, defendant did very little to promote plaintiff’s relationship with the child. According to [the psychologist], while the child’s young age allowed him to separate his positive experiences from defendant’s negative descriptions of plaintiff, there was a genuine threat that the child eventually would reject plaintiff if defendant’s behavior persisted. The record supports this determination.

If there’s enough evidence to support a parental alienation claim, there is legal precedent that the target of these actions should get preferential treatment in a custody matter.

Does Parental Alienation Actually Happen?

Children may be influenced by a parent’s narrative about the other parent, and sustained exposure to denigrating messages can reshape a child’s feelings and memories. Adult survivors of these cult-like situations have reported lasting damage to their ability to form relationships and a deep sense of having been used as instruments in their parents’ conflict.

History is filled with examples of people manipulated by political and religious leaders. Advertisers and marketers attempt to manipulate potential buyers of goods and services because, many times, those efforts work. It’s difficult to argue that no parent can manipulate any child into fearing or hating the other parent. The issue should be whether it actually happened, or was at least attempted, in a particular case.

What’s the Evidence That Parental Alienation Is a Groundless Way to Attack the Other Parent?

The American Psychological Association Dictionary of Psychology has this to say about parental alienation:

Although some accept Parental Alienation Syndrome as admissible evidence in child custody disputes, there have been no well-controlled empirical studies that confirm the phenomenon, nor have a standardized assessment process and specific diagnostic criteria been established for it. Consequently, many critics express concerns about its continued influence on legal proceedings. The syndrome has been dismissed by the American Psychiatric Association, American Psychological Association, and American Medical Association as lacking supporting empirical or clinical evidence and it is not included in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders or the International Classification of Diseases.

However, the description goes on to state:

Despite the significant controversy surrounding this syndrome, the more generalized concept of parental alienation often is viewed as a legitimate dynamic in many family situations, describing the harm done to a child’s security with one caregiver as a result of exposure to another caregiver’s unfavorable actions toward or criticism of that person.

A primary concern among critics of identifying parental alienation is that it misinterprets evidence that would otherwise indicate actual child abuse, reports ProPublica. It can be used as a shield by a parent who abuses their child to escape accountability in a child custody matter by recasting evidence of abuse (a child’s fear of a parent) as evidence of parental alienation.

These situations require deep study and review by forensic experts on a case-by-case basis and careful handling by Family Court Judges.

Contact Kingston Law Group for Help with Child Custody and Parenting Time Disputes

We represent parents on both sides of this issue. We thoroughly investigate allegations of abuse and parental alienation. Based on what we find, we provide our clients with the best options to achieve their goals.  You are over 18 and competent, and therefore it is entirely up to you to decide how you want your matter to be handled.

For help with child custody and parenting time disputes, call us at 609-683-7400 to arrange a near-term, reduced-fee initial consultation. We will listen to your facts, discuss the law, and advise you of your options. We accept credit cards and offer appointments from 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m., Monday through Friday. We also have pre-arranged evening appointments. Contact us today.  You’ll be glad you did!!