Vacation is a time for you to relax with your family. There are so many issues to resolve. When should you go? Can you take time off from work? Where should you go? Can you find things your kids and you want to do together? For many parents, another question comes to mind:  will vacation planning create another dispute with my ex-spouse, possibly embroiling the kids in the fight?

Vacations are an opportunity for each parent to show they’re well-adjusted enough to resolve potential conflicts. Sadly, one or both parents may instead use the situation to show they have enough control to inflict pain on the other parent.

A Vacation Schedule Should Be a Standard Part of Your Parenting Plan

Your custody and parenting time order should have a parenting time schedule that determines how much time you’ll have with your kids each year and when. For some families, the language may be vague for scheduling flexibility, yet vague language may invite disputes.  Many times, spelling out the details is helpful for everyone, understanding that no agreement’s coverage can be all-encompassing.

Vacations shouldn’t come as a surprise. This isn’t a situation where a custodial parent suddenly becomes severely ill or injured and unable to care for their children, upsetting the time off schedule of the non-custodial parent. There is ample time to plan or re-plan your vacation schedule annually and notify the other parent of your wishes.

Though it’s important to have a vacation schedule, sometimes disputes arise when what’s on paper doesn’t work in real life. If a parent is supposed to take the kids on vacation, but they just switched jobs so can’t take time off right away, then the parties should agree to reschedule the time. The right thing to do may be to move an expected August vacation to one in December or January when children aren’t in school.

Like other conflicts between divorced parents, vacation disputes need to be handled like business planning: low on emotion, high in good faith, and resolved in a flexible, practical way.

Conflicts Don’t Take Time Off

If you can’t work out who will take the kids on vacation when, call our office. If your ex-spouse and you can’t seem to make progress, we can discuss approaches that have worked for others in the past. We can negotiate with the other parent or their attorney. We can refer the parties to a qualified mediator who will help the parties resolve their matter efficiently and quickly.  In nearly all cases, the parties will agree to an outcome they can all live with.

Getting the Family Court is possible, even emergently, yet it’s a time- and money-consuming process. Unless you have no choice, you shouldn’t spend money you saved for a vacation (and maybe more) litigating vacation issues. If you feel it’s important enough to you, or your spouse refuses to be reasonable, we can ask a Judge to decide the issue in a way that balances the parents’ rights and the children’s best interests.  If that is your necessary and desired route, it is critical that you give your lawyers as much time and notice as possible to get you into court.

Kingston Law Group: Get the Help You Need from the Lawyers You Trust

If you have any questions about child custody, parenting time, or resolving a vacation dispute, call the Central Jersey law offices of the Kingston Law Group at 609-683-7400, or contact us online for a near-term reduced fee initial consultation. We will listen to your facts, explain the laws, and advise you on how best to obtain legal, economic, and social justice. We will present optimal choices to protect your legal rights and interests and those of your child(ren). Call or write us today. You will be glad you did.